Emotionally immature parents manifest in various types, each impacting their children uniquely. These distinct types contribute to complex parent-child dynamics, influencing children well into adulthood. Here are the four types of emotionally immature parents:
Four Types of Emotionally Immature Parents: How Does Each of Them Impact Children's Mental Health
Reactive Parents
Reactive parents, characterized by emotional volatility, create an environment where walking on eggshells is common. Dr. Lindsay C. Gibson, in her book "Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents," refers to them as "emotional parents." This categorization stems from their tendency to make interactions unpleasant, leading others to second-guess their words and actions.
Growing up around such parents may instill people-pleasing tendencies and difficulties in setting boundaries and understanding emotions in adult children.
Passive Parents
Passive parents, often perceived as the more enjoyable caregivers, excel in connecting with their children during play. Dr. Gibson notes that these parents can be emotionally engaged with their children more than other types but face the issue of being passive in their parenting role.
The challenge arises when they fail to stand up for their child in the face of mistreatment from the other parent, displaying a lack of protective instinct. In instances of the child experiencing distress, such as anger or fear, the passive parent tends to ignore or neglect acknowledgment, hindering the development of healthy relationships for their children in adulthood.
Highly Critical Parents
Highly critical parents are often perceived as perfectionists, who meticulously scrutinize every aspect of their child's actions. Dr. Gibson also labels them as "driven" parents due to their relentless pursuit of goals. Their persistent and controlling nature stems from the belief that achieving perfection is essential for success, instilling a fear of failure in their children.
Sadly, this upbringing can lead to burnout or the pursuit of careers disapproved by these parents, shaping the child's choices based on parental expectations rather than personal passion.
READ ALSO: Parents Who Do These 5 Things Produce Successful Kids, According to Science
Emotionally Unavailable Parents
In contrast to passive parents, emotionally absent parents, go beyond ignoring conflicts or challenging emotions. Termed "rejecting" parents by Dr.Gibson, these parents essentially behave as if their child doesn't exist. Gibson notes that they lack empathy and fail to acknowledge their child's expressions.
This parenting style significantly impacts a person's self-confidence, as the child doesn't feel important enough to command parental attention. Consequently, these children may later seek attention from narcissistic partners, having grown accustomed to accepting minimal acknowledgment and potentially lacking high standards for their relationships.
Navigating Relationships with Emotionally Immature Parents
Growing up with emotionally immature parents may leave children feeling neglected and struggling with emotional expression. Emotional maturity involves understanding and managing emotions appropriately, while emotional immaturity can lead to self-centered behavior.
For children of emotionally immature parents, this pattern can have lasting effects, potentially resulting in emotional neglect or an insecure attachment style.
Experts caution that emotional immaturity in parents can be seen as a result of unmet emotional needs during their upbringing rather than a character flaw.
To improve relationships with emotionally immature parents, experts suggest setting boundaries, disengaging when necessary, and openly communicating thoughts and feelings. Seeking support from a mental health professional, such as therapy, is encouraged to navigate the complexities of power dynamics and past emotional abuse.
RELATED ARTICLE: Parenting: New Science-Based Book Teaches How to Raise Generous, Honest, Kind Kids
Check out more news and information on Parenting in Science Times.
