Sure, phone calls could now be one of the least important things out there - somewhere behind email, text messages, Google, Facebook, and more. Yet calls aren't something that you alone should absolutely prevent.
PHILADELPHIA - SEPTEMBER 26: A headset hangs on a cubical wall after the last telemarketing shift at Spectrum Marketing Services, Inc. September 26, 2003, in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Spectrum Marketing Services, Inc., which had been in business since 1974, and as of January 2003, employed 125 people, was forced to close its doors due to the Do Not Call Registry.
You can schedule an online restaurant reservation or doctor's appointment through phone calls. You can submit a resumé in writing, but then you have to wait for a telephone interview. Or perhaps you have a Zoom meeting. That's no big deal for other people.
For others, though, it takes a Herculean effort to pick up the phone. They rehearse a thousand times what they have to say, they call with shaking hands, they get a panicky feeling in their chest when they hear a ring from the other end.
Although you do need the phone for big and small purposes, knowing why you have it in the first place is the first step to getting over your anxiety.
Phone Call Anxiety: How to Understand Telephobia
Phone call anxiety, a common fear for people with social anxiety disorder, is often called "telephobia."
Steve Mazza, Ph.D., a licensed clinical psychologist at the Columbia University Clinic for Anxiety and Associated Disorders, told Inside Hook that telephobia cultivates fear of unwanted social contact, especially when phone calls are involved.
Any emotional signs of phone anxiety, according to VeryWellMind, can include:
- Avoid making calls or asking someone to contact for you
- Delay in making or answering phone calls
- Obsessing what has been said after calls
- Stress over self-embarrassment
- Worry about troubling the other person
- Worry over what you're going to say
Physical signs of anxiety over the phone can include:
- Increased heart rate
- Nausea
- Shaking
- Difficulty focusing
While it can sound like an easy job to answer the phone and make calls that everybody should be able to do, the fear may be horrifying and true if you suffer from telephobia.
Phone Call Anxiety: Why Do We Avoid Phone Calls?
It can be overwhelming to communicate on the phone when we are confined to only the sounds of our voices. This apprehension also arises because there is a lack of verbal or visual signs that help promote a social discussion, Mazza explained. People may then become self-conscious about the sound of their own voices and words of choice.
Thanks to technology, we can also go days, weeks, or even months without communicating with anyone directly on the phone. One research, titled "Text or Talk? Social Anxiety, Loneliness, and Divergent Preferences for Cell Phone Use," showed that anxious individuals prefer texting to telephone calls, ranking it a 'superior medium' for expressive and personal communication.
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Some people prefer to text because it allows them to think about their messages' wording and be casual. In certain instances, a distinct identity is formed independently and, in contrast to their real-life, more reticent selves.
The same research indicated that phone anxiety is related to a curiosity for what the other entity thinks about them. Text messages may give people with phone anxiety a means of making social communication without the risk of dismissal or criticism by avoiding the instant response of those in spoken conversations.
Phone Call Anxiety: How to Pick up The Phone
Ready to say goodbye to fear on the phone? As suggested by Bustle, try these tips to steadily work your way to the success of your anxiety.
Take A Deep Breath
A perfect time to practice is deep breathing before and right before pressing the "call" button. It's a safe way to relieve tension and clear your mind with deep breathing, so inhale slowly and then make the call.
Write A Script Out
You certainly don't need to type it down in advance if you call a friend to talk about your day. But if you're, say, calling your buddies to share your thoughts, a script will certainly be helpful. Knowing what you're about to say will remove a lot of tension because it gives you something to read about when the other line rings.
Rehearse Aloud
Read it aloud to yourself a couple of times after you've written down what you need to say. You will feel foolish doing it, but rehearsing may make it feel more normal to say it. To be secure, do it as many times as it takes.
Reframe The View
Psychologists use cognitive restructuring to adjust your understanding of the phone call to help you get through it. For one, if you're concerned that your sentences will fumble and sound like a fool, note that even if you screw up, you're definitely not going to be the first person to mess up in front of them or the only person they're talking to that day. In other words, for them, it's not even as much of a deal as it is for you.
Practice
Sorry, but practice makes perfect. The best way to get better at something is to keep doing it, and making phone calls is included to get rid of anxiety.
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